Facing My Fear of Hair loss....

A few days ago, I woke early in the morning to use the restroom and as I gently grazed my hair, it began to come out from the root.  I knew that this moment would come but it is a total shock to the system.  I wept uncontrollably, unable to catch my breath at times.  I had just hoped that I could be that one in a million who didn't lose their hair to cancer.
My hair has been my crown for so long that I morned the loss of my identity as I had known it.  I wanted nothing more than to just accept it, but it was hard.  I know that at the end of the day, this is just a part of the journey, and I gave myself permission to be sad and afraid if that's how I felt.  I am not a fan of suppressing my true feelings. I believe that you have the right to "feel" and process your way through it.
Nonetheless, after the tears, I made the call to my mom and my cousins.  I simply said, "Tonight I have to let it go!".  By the time my mother and cousins had arrived to cut my hair, I was ready.  I was ready to take control of something and not allow cancer to have it's way and cause so much stress.  I decided that I would lose my hair on my own terms.
This is a new journey for me as you can imagine.  Who will you see when you look at me and no longer see my hair? Who will I see when I look in the mirror?  Who exactly am I?  As India Arie simply stated, "I am not my hair, I am not this skin, I am the soul that lives within...".  I will continue to share this journey with you and I look forward to trying out new styles with beautiful wigs, hats and scarfs! Ever since I've made the big chop, there have been no more tears! Facing your fears no matter what they may be is the way to go!

I invite you to view this very special moment when I decided to let it go:


https://youtu.be/DhsKySqPH3s